Saturday, November 18, 2006
Dining with Family
Before we got married to each other, my husband and I had been single for a good many years and have some "single" habits- one of which is having your meals in the living room while watching TV. Even after we had Mary, we rarely had meals in the kitchen or dining room.
We had moved to our current home about a year and a half ago. For a long while, we had Mary on a kid chair sitting in front of the coffee table and having her lunch or dinner while watching TV with us. So, you can imagine the spills, clean-up, stains that can't be wiped off the carpet. Then came time to wet vac the carpet.
So now we have our meals, TOGETHER, as a family in the kitchen.
And this made for some good quality time together. Without TV to distract us, we had to talk- to each other.
Tonight, I was telling Jack how it was when I was growing up in the Philippines. I come from a big family - six kids, Mommy and Daddy, a couple of maids a lot of the time, a grandparent or 2 at one time or the other. I am the fourth child of Victor Vergara and Casimera Francisco, their 2nd daughter. Though tonight, I was telling Jack how we sit down for meals. We have our fixed positions at the dining room table. Looking back, what I am wondering about was how the places were set. It was not on any age order or gender division.
My dad would sit at the head of the table (8-seater boat-shape table), my mom was on his right, then it's my youngest sister (sixth child) , then the 2nd youngest sister (5th). On my dad's left would be my 2nd oldest brother (3rd) (my oldest brother was not around much by this time), me (4th)and then my oldest sister (2nd). The other end of the table would be for any guest who will be joining us for the meal. Not really a good place to sit - one's back would be facing the TV. Yes, we had a TV in the dining room. Even with the TV on at mealtimes (we always had lunch at exactly 12 noon- in time for a popular lunchtime Filipino variety show, dinner was at 6 pm- in time for the news), I still remember a lot of lively family talks during mealtimes....
What is interesting to me is what happened when my dad is not present for a mealtime. My brother would take his place, my oldest sister would then sit in my brother's place. I somehow stay at my place on the table. My mom will never sit at the head of the table.
Mary enjoys the mealtimes together. She regales us about the "rules" in her daycare class. "Start eating when everyone is served." "Wait till everyone had seconds before having thirds." And then there is the "No-thank-you-bite" instead of just outright saying "Yecccccch!" to something that looks unappetizing. Glad to know she is learning table manners at school. I hope she will have a lot of fond memories of our family's table as I have with mine.
Before we got married to each other, my husband and I had been single for a good many years and have some "single" habits- one of which is having your meals in the living room while watching TV. Even after we had Mary, we rarely had meals in the kitchen or dining room.
We had moved to our current home about a year and a half ago. For a long while, we had Mary on a kid chair sitting in front of the coffee table and having her lunch or dinner while watching TV with us. So, you can imagine the spills, clean-up, stains that can't be wiped off the carpet. Then came time to wet vac the carpet.
So now we have our meals, TOGETHER, as a family in the kitchen.
And this made for some good quality time together. Without TV to distract us, we had to talk- to each other.
Tonight, I was telling Jack how it was when I was growing up in the Philippines. I come from a big family - six kids, Mommy and Daddy, a couple of maids a lot of the time, a grandparent or 2 at one time or the other. I am the fourth child of Victor Vergara and Casimera Francisco, their 2nd daughter. Though tonight, I was telling Jack how we sit down for meals. We have our fixed positions at the dining room table. Looking back, what I am wondering about was how the places were set. It was not on any age order or gender division.
My dad would sit at the head of the table (8-seater boat-shape table), my mom was on his right, then it's my youngest sister (sixth child) , then the 2nd youngest sister (5th). On my dad's left would be my 2nd oldest brother (3rd) (my oldest brother was not around much by this time), me (4th)and then my oldest sister (2nd). The other end of the table would be for any guest who will be joining us for the meal. Not really a good place to sit - one's back would be facing the TV. Yes, we had a TV in the dining room. Even with the TV on at mealtimes (we always had lunch at exactly 12 noon- in time for a popular lunchtime Filipino variety show, dinner was at 6 pm- in time for the news), I still remember a lot of lively family talks during mealtimes....
What is interesting to me is what happened when my dad is not present for a mealtime. My brother would take his place, my oldest sister would then sit in my brother's place. I somehow stay at my place on the table. My mom will never sit at the head of the table.
Mary enjoys the mealtimes together. She regales us about the "rules" in her daycare class. "Start eating when everyone is served." "Wait till everyone had seconds before having thirds." And then there is the "No-thank-you-bite" instead of just outright saying "Yecccccch!" to something that looks unappetizing. Glad to know she is learning table manners at school. I hope she will have a lot of fond memories of our family's table as I have with mine.
Labels: Family Mealtimes
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So funny...
I remember being able to sit right next to mom during meals (I still do). When I was younger I still remember putting my elbow on mom's elbow. Hahaha.
It's to funny how we grew up with these rules and finding out it was not as common as I thought. I thought everybody's like that (for our culture, at least). Family meals are great for family bonding as well.
I miss having you around and having the family meals we used to have. That was a long time ago, or at least I was still in my grade school years.
Nothing has changed, really, except for the usual people who sit in their usual places... The eldest sis was replaced by my nephew Josh and you were replaced by Ate Edit. But the usual rules still exists.
:)
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I remember being able to sit right next to mom during meals (I still do). When I was younger I still remember putting my elbow on mom's elbow. Hahaha.
It's to funny how we grew up with these rules and finding out it was not as common as I thought. I thought everybody's like that (for our culture, at least). Family meals are great for family bonding as well.
I miss having you around and having the family meals we used to have. That was a long time ago, or at least I was still in my grade school years.
Nothing has changed, really, except for the usual people who sit in their usual places... The eldest sis was replaced by my nephew Josh and you were replaced by Ate Edit. But the usual rules still exists.
:)
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